maybe
that's where the healing begins.
Who has happened across old pictures of themselves and cringed. Not just about a hideous haircut (because we should all have at least one of those in our past, builds character), but where you just can’t believe how you looked.
I have a very specific picture in mind. My mind goes straight to how fat I thought I was. It was a family trip to Hawaii. I looked at the picture and thought “Oh My God, look at me!” When I tap into how I was feeling at that time, I didn’t feel fat. I remember being so excited to watch the ocean from my hotel balcony. The feeling of the warm sun as I rocked in a hammock. Of laughing with my family as we enjoyed being in this gorgeous, amazing place.
But gratitude for a body that let me walk, explore and relax was not my first reaction. My guess is gratitude and appreciation for your body probably aren’t your first reactions either.
Body shame is a heavy topic to unpack. It doesn’t discriminate. You see it all the time, celebrities (usually female) talking about how every photo/outfit/moment seems to be photographed and offered up to the masses to pick apart. There is really no way for any of us to win. Too curvy, why aren’t you dieting. Too thin, just eat something already. You can be sure there is an ideal body we all are supposed to have, too bad the goal we are intended to reach keeps changing.
This topic has been on my heart lately because as I am doing the work to heal and unpack my own feelings about my body, I see and hear those around me struggling with this too. I do sometimes wish there was a magic answer. I wish this change was easy, and there would be a point at which I am done and won’t ever have to deal with this again. There are days I am done with this journey, it is frustrating, exhausting and sometimes cruel.
However, on the other side of those days is a freedom that comes with letting go of my thoughts of what a perfect body looks like. Even at my thinnest, I still saw only flaws with my body. So why continue punishing myself for never being perfect enough? That’s a tough question and someday I hope that it’s a question I don’t have to keep answering for myself.
"Yes! Start the conversation! We need to see more of this!"
But their eyes will say, "Thank God that's not mine."
What helped me start to unpack and confront my own body shaming was the content I was consuming. It can be hard, especially online, to find people who are interested in changing the conversation. The health and fitness world is notorious for shaming people and as a part of that community I wanted to change the conversation to be more inclusive. You can’t shame and bully someone into health and who am I to say what’s healthy for you. My job is to be the support, the mirror, the guide to get you to your best self. However you want that to look like.
Below are 2 books that just blew my mind when I was ready to start the reframing how I viewed and spoke about my body.
🌟 Body Positive Power by Megan Jayne Crabbe
🌟 The Body is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor
Now books are great but sometimes you need real action steps when you find yourself having one of those days. I love @thebodylovesociety on Instagram. I am slowly weeding out accounts that don’t make me feel good about myself, but this account stays because they have such supportive content.
Let me know how I can support you to take the steps toward loving yourself more. Let’s create a community that supports and encourages each other. The dialogue needs to change, let’s do that together.
