I think I’m doing this wrong, I don’t love my body…my story

This is part 1 in a multi-part series I will be doing. As I got to writing this post, I realized all I want to say and share on this subject obviously won’t fit into one blog post. Stay tuned for more!

I don’t remember how I found the body positivity, body acceptance community. What I remember is slowly my Instagram and podcast feeds filling with voices talking about Intuitive Eating and HAES (Health At Every Size), I was seeing pictures of bodies like mine and some larger, being celebrated for their beauty just as they are (not when they lose __ pounds). 

At the time I found myself at a cross roads, I was heavily steeped in diet culture, it was all I had ever known. I was sure my worth was tied up in eating perfectly and working out at least 6 days a week. It’s hard not to get caught up in that mindset when you are complimented for all the weight you have lost, or your amazing will power to say no to that cupcake, your dedication to the gym when even though you hurt, you still go.

I bought into every book and infomercial selling the next diet or fitness gadget. I was willing to try them all because I knew if I could just get myself in the “right” shape, then bye-bye ugly duckling, helllooo swan.

I was doing everything diet culture told me too, but my fabulous new life wasn’t showing up, and I was mad. Slowly I started to see behind the curtain and realize that there were these new voices and thoughts starting to permeate and seeds were planted. I began asking myself why.

Why was it that I told myself that I couldn’t be trusted around “bad” food, and needed the structure of a schedule to make sure I ate at the right time and the right things. Why was I working out all the time, even when my body was obviously telling me to rest. Why did I still feel like my body would never be good enough.

The questioning started first with my eating. Every week it felt like I was white knuckling it through to Saturday, the day I allowed myself to eat anything and everything I wanted. What usually happened was a food coma, a belly ache and the promise to not do this again next week. Wish I could say that never happened again.😕 But it did and every Sunday started with the promise to do better and be stronger and then I wouldn’t feel like a failure.

I do believe that most change won’t happen (or last), if you aren’t ready to make that change. So I started explore Intuitive Eating and begin the process to reconnect to and listen to my body. 

I was introduce to the idea of body liberation. Jes Baker and Sonya Renee Taylor (and so many more) are leading the charge on this and doing amazing work. Sonya’s book, The Body is Not an Apology blew my mind. Her practice of radical self love was finally the permission I needed to start this long healing process to loving and accepting myself and my body for being amazing, just as it is.

Suddenly I was questioning everything. If I was allowed to love/accept myself just as I was, what else could I do, what other freedoms were out there. So I broke the process down into steps, today I share 3 accessible tips to let you explore this idea of loving and connecting to your body (if you have my free PDF, then you know what’s coming, if not, ENJOY!).

Body Love Tip #1: Move your body.

First rule, pick something YOU want to do and can do. If you love lifting weights, perfect. Want to try that spin class, awesome. Impromptu dance party in the kitchen, I’m there! Find a way of making moving your body fun, and in a way that honors where your body is now. If an injury or weight gain, or life has made movement feel foreign be extra kind to yourself as you rediscover movement.

Body Love Tip #2: Speak Kindly to Yourself.

I’m talking about that voice in your head that freaks out when it catches a glimpse of you at an unflattering angle, when your pants don’t fit quite like they used to, or when you start to compare yourself to others on the internet. Today we start to change that voice.

I want you to pick one body part, and list 3 reasons why you love it or why you are grateful for it. Take the time to look lovingly at your body and find the good. 

Write those things down and put it somewhere you will see it. Let it be a reminder to you of how wonderful your body is (especially when that negative voice creeps back in).

Body Love Tip #3: Find Your Look

Do you have something that you wear that makes you feel like a rockstar? This is your time to find that jacket, necklace, shade of lipstick that makes you feel like a million bucks. It is the baby step version of fake it till you make it. Think of it as being good to yourself. You are treating your body with the pride and respect it deserves.

Body liberation and freedom are big topics, and I intend to speak more about them. I see my work as being a guide to bring others across the divide to the place where they can find love and peace for themselves.

We have so many more fun and interesting topics to dive into, I am so grateful to have all of you along on this journey with me!